By Dale Sellers

I spent some time developing a list of best practices that we’ve included in some of our recent posts. These practices are incredibly valuable for creating a healthy, sustainable ministry culture. With that in mind, I’d like to highlight a few of them so you can evaluate how your ministry is currently implementing them.

Best practice: When resistance hits, calmly lay out options, keep seeking solutions, and keep the mission in front of you.

 

When leadership change doesn’t go as planned, opposition can shake your confidence. This post contains 5 practical ways to lead through failure with courage—staying mission-focused, seeking wise counsel, and creating small wins that rebuild momentum.

I remember the epiphany I had the first time I heard someone say failure isn’t final. Those three words lifted a huge weight that I had been carrying for years. That weight developed after a season of failed attempts at implementing some sure-fire methods I had been convinced would help our small church grow.

After all, the leaders who taught those principles all had very large successful churches. I believed our church would blossom into a large church if only I would do what they did. But years of trying to do what they did didn’t produce much. Our church wasn’t stagnant or even diminishing, but we weren’t growing the way I assumed we would.

Honestly, it was a much bigger deal to me that our church wasn’t experiencing explosive growth than to my congregation. We actually had several years where we were quite healthy. People were giving their lives to Jesus on a consistent basis. There was a genuine love for each other that created a vibrant community. We also had a level of unity that I discovered was uncommon in many of the churches around us.

No one in our church ever knew the inner turmoil I was dealing with. Its source came from the pressure that I was putting on myself to grow the church. I often say we live today in the residue of the seeker and attractional movements of the American church.

Many of my peers also felt the crushing weight of unrealistic expectations they put on themselves. We erroneously defined church success by the number of people who showed up each week. It was normal to ask a fellow pastor how many people were attending whenever you crossed paths.

This obsession with numerical growth, combined with statements like “healthy things grow,” created a panic in me that soon led me to take action. Over a few years, I tried several of the “guaranteed” programs that promised to take us to the next level.

There was little resistance to these ideas because I had a great deal of buy-in and support from my congregation. They trusted me and believed I was clearly hearing from the Lord. Yet, none of the new directions ever produced any results. And I began to feel the weight of the pressure from failure increasing as well.

It’s really easy to lead a group of people when you have confidence that you know where you’re going and what you’re doing. However, it’s a whole different dynamic when you have assured those you lead that the next big thing is going to produce a certain result. At some point, you begin to feel discouraged from the internal feeling that people are doubting and questioning you.

Leading Through Opposition

You may relate to what I experienced while leading through failure. It’s even possible that you may find yourself stalled out at this moment. If so, I’d like to offer some practical solutions to help you navigate through the obstacles in your path.

1 – Come clean with yourself first.

Self-doubt is worse than outside doubt. What you believe about yourself will determine how you navigate leading through opposition. I have been, by far, the greatest critic of myself throughout my life. Sadly, I still am. Sixty years of always blaming myself and holding myself to an unrealistic standard is super hard to overcome.

If you’re like me, I want to encourage you to learn from King David. The Bible says David “encouraged himself in the Lord” in 1 Samuel 30:6 when he was under intense questioning about his ability to lead.

Self-encouragement may be the only encouragement you receive for a while. Make sure that you don’t join in with everyone else who are piling on when the tough times come.

2 – Rely on the direction of your mission/vision to get things back on track.

There is no way to accurately quantify the importance of understanding your mission and vision when difficult times arise. Your mission describes why your ministry exists. It is the foundation of everything you believe Jesus has called you to do. It serves as clarifying guardrails when traveling through stormy weather. Trust it to keep you on the path.

Your vision describes where you are going. It serves as the map for the journey. Leadership opposition, especially when we are the ones who created the problem, can create a long detour off the path we started on. This is why it is so important to review and renew the vision plan. Doing so will soon help you to get back on track.

3 – Seek counsel from leaders who have already walked through what you’re experiencing.

King Solomon reminds us in Ecclesiastes 1:9 that there’s nothing new under the sun. In other words, somebody else has already faced what you’re dealing with. Some handled it well while others handled it poorly.

The greatest experience we can gain comes from learning how someone else dealt with what you’re dealing with. Learning from other leaders’ experience can be much less painful than learning from your own experience. Intentionally pursue leaders who have faced similar situations and overcome them. You will most likely be encouraged by their story of overcoming.

4 – Create solutions that accomplish immediate wins.

Look for “low-hanging fruit” when leading out of difficult circumstances. A big mistake many leaders make is failing to recognize how a small win can kick-start momentum. It’s common to seek the big solution to a big problem. However, developing several small solutions that piggyback on each other can eventually morph into the big solution you were seeking.

5 – Don’t underestimate the value of modeling a calm demeanor in difficult times.

Albert Mehrabian, a researcher in body language, developed a formula that estimates how much of communication is nonverbal. His 55/38/7 formula describing communication states that 55% is body language, 38% is tone of voice, and only 7% is spoken words.

I don’t know if these percentages are correct. However, I do know that great communicators are aware of the impact of how we present what we say. People can watch us say positive words only to discount them because of our negative presentation.

Body language, including posture and gestures, conveys a message. Things like pitch, speed, and inflection in our tone of voice also do. And you obviously know the impact of facial expressions. Smiles, frowns, and eye contact go a long way in communicating your perspective.

All that to say, make it a priority to discuss solutions calmly. Your peaceful demeanor is contagious. It will communicate the confidence necessary to rally the troops for a win. When failure frames the leadership change you’ve been attempting to implement, refuse to panic. Keep working the problem. Develop confidence within yourself to believe transformation is possible. Let the Holy Spirit fill you with peace that He will guide you to a solid solution.

Jesus promised to build His Church. You and I are only workers that He has called to join Him in this eternal calling. He promised to complete the good work He began in you. Therefore, don’t panic in the midst of failure, even if you may have caused it. Accept His grace and receive His power to keep on keeping on to the end.

Suggested 95Network resources

• Failure Is Not an Option: Leading Church Transformation in Challenging Times
• How to Overcome the Opposition to Change
• 4 Signs You’re Leading From a Place of Fear
• Podcast: Carl & Kalani Culley on Small Church Leadership, Feelings of Failure (Episode 73)

What are you doing that is working well? What is not going so well? Let’s connect and have a conversation about it. At 95Network, we are here to support and serve you in any way we can. If you feel like you’re in a season where you’re stalled out and can’t see the way forward, then please reach out to me at [email protected]

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